Morning Fatness Update

Let's get right into it, shall we?

338.6 lbs

Now, I haven't crapped in 2 days, so I'm not worried about it.

A brief word on my favorite topic other than dick jokes: poop. Now, I get into a cycle with this diet. Most of the time, I have no trouble crapping on it. Hell, I crap like the mighty Niagra Falls. However, this has, on occasion, been detrimental to things like going outside or sleeping. Sometimes, the spigot just won't turn off.

At such times as this, I call in my friend Gandalf.

Now, I don't know about anyone else, but I love this shit. Crapping stops IMMEDIATELY, and frequently for a few days. Now, normally, not crapping for a few days would be bloating and painful, however, as my shits are all smaller than my wallet. I currently crap less in four days than I normally do in a day, so it's actually fun to have a few days without crapping: at the end I feel like I've actually taken a shit.

In other news, I fucking hate TV. I have a DVR and I don't think I could watch TV on a diet without it. Denny's ads are like porn to me. The things I would do to biscuits and gravy defy description right now. Fortunately, an Old Spice ad came on immediately after the Denny's ad, and that made me not so hungry.



That is going on the "hunger killer" videos list.