GOOD MORNING

Well, I can't say I'm back on schedule or anything, since I woke up at 2am, but at least that means I got to have breakfast today.

For this morning's entree, I chose the Homestyle Pancakes. They're the first frozen food I've had since getting back on the program, and they're one of my better breakfast options. Due to a propensity for skipping breakfast or not being awake for it, I've got more frozen breakfasts than anything else. I've got about a week's worth of them, but only one dinner and no lunches left.

For my sides, I enjoyed a single large egg (protein) cooked on some non-stick spray, a piece of 15 grain toast (carbohydrate), and an apple juicebox (fruit).

A good breakfast, I'd say. The pancakes are a little sweet, but in general remind me of whole wheat pancakes. They're ok to eat on their own, which is good, since sugar-free syrup is like spooge post vasectomy, the potency is gone. The fun thing about a lot of these dishes is they seem to be chemically engineered to fill your stomach. Oddly enough, the "rib-sticking" factor that the one guy creams his jeans about in the commercials is the best way to describe it.

One thing this diet has driven home to me is how crazy portions are in restaurants and whatnot.

This is a 4oz juice box. It is, obviously, marketed for pre-schoolers. These damned things are only in about 1/4 of the grocery stores I've been in, and in none of the big box stores like Sam's or BJ's. My main point, however, is that this damned thing fits in the palm of my hand. THIS is an appropriately sized fruit serving. For comparison:

We all remember Ecto Coolers, (if you don't, fuck you youngin etc. etc.). For most of it's run, from what I can tell, including the years I'd have sucked these down like a greedy little tubkins (although I didn't get fat until later) these were 8.45 oz. That means that you were basically feeding a kid double what you should feed a fucking adult for a single serving. On the other hand, I can't think of 8.45 oz of liquid in any way actually slaking my thirst under most circumstances. Of course, if I'm actually thirsty I'm most likely to drink just water.

Now, apparently, the standard size is 6.75 oz for juice boxes, which has little bearing on the point I really want to make. I can't believe how tiny the portions of what I should be eating are compared to what I'd just order at a restaurant in "normal" quantity.

That is a picture of His Holiness the 14th Dalai Llama, because I found it faster than a picture of a small McDonald's orange juice. I could go out, buy one, and take a picture of one, but fuck that, and soon you'll see why.

Apparently, a god-damned small OJ from Mickey D's is either 12 or 16 oz, from what I can tell from the internets. Now, that's either 3 or 4 servings of fruit. That is insane when you think about the fact that most of us would just order that with our breakfasts thinking we were being good for not having coffee with fucking cream, or rather than having a soda with breakfast, or that "at least I'm eating some fruit with this horrific fried lump of potato and death sandwich". Of course, in proportion to the other shit you'll get in that meal, it's probably about right.

Fuck it, go on about your business, I'll see you at lunch.